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:: Yet Another Weird Dream :: Going Insane ::
January 31, 2007
Okay, so I was taking my usual afternoon nap. Meh, I told myself I won't make it a habit this year, as it'll end up messing up my sleeping cycle and thus, making me despicably sleepy the next day and therefore, I won't be able to focus in class. It might sound cool itself but frankly, it's not. It's really, really nasty once you find out that you got left behind in your lessons or subjects by a few chapters. But, oh well. Anyway, back to the topic. Apparently, my brain constructed yet another dream, though this time it somehow reflected a side of me which I have kept mostly to myself. What I want to do, where I want to be, my perspective of the people who come and go along the way... Heck, it's like it was ripped right out of the present timeline - Well, of my life that is. While we're at it, I might as well write them down here, from my personal 'cache' before they become too faint to recall.
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( Something else went on before this... I can't really remember. It's fading alittle too fast for me. This is just a faint retrospect )
I was witnessing an event... or rather commotion in a park. An enraged guy was throwing stones at another person who was in the park lake ( or at least it looked like one ). I was in the water with the victim as well, looking from behind him at a reasonable distance; not too far, yet not too close.
"Don't let me hear you say that again!"
"Ouch! Stop it!"
"Why, you little...!"
Then, familiar looking another man, clad in brown coat dived into the lake and used his coat as a barrier against the bombarding stones. That man led the victim to safety, the only safe zone - deeper into the lake, farther from the bank. This is where it got confusing - I replaced the victim. The 'saviour' turned out to be my brother. Both of us swam, swam, and swam... To where? We did not know. As we swam, the 'lake' became somewhat a neverending watery grave.
After a few more strokes, it wasn't that deep anymore. We were standing on flat surface. I could feel the rough gravel and concrete against my feet. I could see a 'port', with two sailors standing at the edge. My 'brother' at that time had depleted all of his remaining energy. Being the stronger one at that time, I carried him in my arms, made easier with the existence of buoyancy. I've always had a fear : You never know what you're bound to step on in murky water. I actually felt the fear surging through me, eventhough I know it was a dream, a dream that I could just stop if I had just blinked my eyes hard. But, it just seemed so... real. Too real that at one point, I doubted if it was really a dream. So, I continued on, towards the 'port', overcoming my fear with every step of the way. We reached there safely, without any 'alien encounters'. The two 'sailors' that I assumed were sailors, turned out to be... Umm. Sailors. They lent us a helping hand and helped us back to our feet again, only this time it was on a ground which I could really see with my own two eyes. Thennnnnnnn... I don't know and don't want to know how my 'brother' magically conjoured an unbelievably dry backpack with dry clothes in them by his side. He had even got my favourite pair of shorts! Anyhow, there were no questions asked regarding them. We quickly changed and headed straight to the 'meeting' place.
All of a sudden, we were already at one of my relative's house in Penang, presumably - I assumed so for my relatives and Dad were there. My 'brother' went his own way upon arriving. I looked around. Nope. Definitely not a place I had been before in my life. My 'dad' was sleeping on an armchair near the door. I overheard my relatives saying that he had been sleeping for two days straight then ( I can't remember exactly when and how long ). I guessed he was 'paying back' the sleep hours he'd missed for God-knows how long. Sooo...they were watching something on a big-screen TV. I joined in as I was kinda interested in that program as well. And yeap, you guessed it - No memory of that program at all. I only remember rushing to the controller and fiddling nervously with it while trying to turn the volume down, which everyone realised it was too loud only after they left the hall. My 'brother' was nowhere to be seen nor found.
A certain period of time passed then. Before I noticed it, it was time I left for home - KL. I recall having to go back there and then for a certain reason, an important one. However, 'dad', who was supposed to fetch me home was reluctant to do so until the next day. That was expected from him, anyway. Possessing a rebellious nature, I decided to walk home all the way, alone. It was still dark, not after nightfall but before the dawn breaks. I embarked on my 'epic' journey on my trusty 'contraptions', that I had with me for ages - My pair o' legs. So much for a good start.
I walked along the highway and eventually reached a toll. The sky was already quite bright at that time, enough for me to clearly see whatever that's happening around me. Interestingly out-of-the-ordinary, even pedestrians have to pay for the usage of the highway. Yes, I mean even on their feet. And again, I was unconsciously riding a motorbike, that magically appeared and was following close, behind the 'pedestrian-queue'. I didn't know I knew how to ride a motorbike. So, I unskillfully swerved left to right and right to left to avoid the already-chaotic traffic and also to reach the shortest queue. Finally, it was my turn. Unlike the normal and tall booth you see everyday, there were humans there instead. Ok, fine. People. There were about 3-4 Indian guys ( No racism intended ) collecting the toll fees. I were to pay RM1.30 for the toll.
"Here. 1 Ringgit and... 30 sen."
"Oh, look! It's 2 Ringgit. See that tear."
"Ch'."
I rolled my eyes and walked pass them anyway. I walked out the wrong way and almost got hit by a car. I managed to come back to my senses from that momentary shock after a few seconds. I had only walked a few meters from where I last stopped before I saw a big doggie, with clean, silky, and long fur from the corner of my eyes. I stared at it for a moment before continuing on my journey. Unexpectedly, it followed me. I continued walking, looking back at it occasionally. And before I knew it, I was following it. It was sort of leading me to a place. It knew where I was heading and what I was intending to do.
We, the doggie and I walked for hours and hours, though I didn't feel it in my dream. Time passed quickly. Things only started slowing down when nightfall engulfed the orange sky. The doggie led me to a dilapidated and rundown low-cost flat area. I did not know where it was leading me to. I was just merely... following. I glanced over to the doggie while walking side-by-side with it. It looked sad. I hesitantly placed my hand on its back and stroked its soft fur gently. It didn't seem to mind. I then stroked its neck, from the bottom jaw down. The texture, the touch - is just so undeniably familiar. Feels like one of my soft toys. A flash followed.
I was at home again. And hello, Mum. Welcome home.
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There you have it. Another weird dream from me. I told my mum the gist of it. She just laughed it off and said that maybe it has something to do with my dad. True, perhaps. The one who saved me in the dream probably symbolises that he, my brother cares for my well-being and that I know it. Secondly, I might get lost on the way, as in reference to the 'watery grave'. Perhaps I just need an objective in life, or rather know what I live for. Helping others and vise versa might be the process to success, i.e : the sailors. Lastly, the doggie might be telling me that my dad needs me to spend some time with him, and not avoiding him, thus the reason for leading me to the flat area. He's moving into one real soon.
P.S : Sorry for the baby talk; Doggie. Old time habit ._.
.::Jolene::.
... as said by Joo
at 4:55 pm